Temptations & Ambitions

God never directly said He created men in his image. God never directly told us that the world started with 2 human beings. It was all mentioned in inscriptions, by humans, just to make ourselves special. Most folklores mentioned that, because they figured that humans have to start somewhere, thus allowing the story to begin with a man and a woman. In terms of creation, I believed God must have greater powers to do anything, but why must we be deluded that we are the special ones created by God? What rights do we hold apart from sharing the same living rock with other life forms? Just because we think that we are special, do we have the rights over the others? The Jews in Israel would be thinking the same way too. They are the special chosen ones, and the other races are as much worthless. Killing a few more Palestinian is just like slaughtering a few more chickens. The death of a few Americans are worth more than hundreds of Iraqians shot and tortured. Have you ever ponder upon this?


Well, that's another debate on its own. I've no real intention to shoot at any religion, but to share the unnatural selection of the modern human population, defying Darwinian's theory. Darwinian's theory is valid for life forms up till civilizations. Human may have been subjected to the same rule previously, but all we could say was, it might not have been now.

If you've read the Daily Chili, there's this article on "Shorter, Fatter and Having Sex Earlier".


Common sense may tell us that perhaps slimmer, prettier girls may survive the century-old studies of natural selection. What could be the reason of such argument?

Could it be that shorter, fatter is the new definition of beauty?

Could it because there is more to love?

Could it be that slim pretty girls are get laid, while shorter fatter girls are the choice to get married?

Or could it be that hot chicks end up as lesbians?

Or could it be the genetics from their short fat father predominates?

No one really knows, but with medical advancement, natural selection has started to go haywire. While strength has been a dominant trait of males from the hunting needs ages ago, we've now lady-like males. Macho was the stamp of a real man previously, but effiminate males have been currently displacing these "macho" men.

Or how fools on bikes would have been weeded out of the selection pool if we've no medical advancement to heal broken bones, just to let them loose again on the roads to create even more havoc.

We've no idea how the world revolves. But we only know that it is going to be unpredictable.

It's been a while since I've last updated here. I'm blaming it partially on the slow connection speed in my hostel, and the other on my rather stressed out schedule, trying to attend the ward rounds where we've to cover the beds just for nothing. Because most doctors won't bother to listen to our presentation, or to explain anything. They talk softly among themselves, and anything medical, don't believe the Orthopedics doctors. We've seen "misdiagnosed" Parkinson, poor medical management, grumpy doctors and lots of ego. And this is where our attendance are to be taken to avoid being barred from exams. Doing my own rounds among medical students would benefit more than this. But then, it's the 5th week tomorrow and I've yet to practice the physical examination. *Sigh*

But that's another story. Today's post is that... I'm done with slow surfing! After days of agony and research, I've found the best plan for me. Yes, it's just me, because different people have different needs, and I've tailored it to mine. It's Digi Broadband amidst the initial reluctance.

Why would I choose Digi? The reason's simple. Streamyx is not available for my hostel, and my hostel's wifi (jaring) could afford torrent downloads when the need arises, despite their slow surfing speed (Too many loading PPStream and Torrent clients). P1 WiMax is out of the picture because I've nobody to share it with. P1 WiMax is seriously, worth it now with their "Potong" promotion if you have 2 or more people sharing it. That is, if you don't mind their volume capping compared to streamyx with unlimited download.

So that left me with mobile broadband, which I hope I could use next year should I be posted in some rural place or Teluk Intan where EDGE is present. WiMax might take ages to cover anywhere out of Klang Valley and some major cities. Nationwide coverage is a rather costly thing, so I've gave up on that.

Celcom and U-mobile are the worst wireless broadband provider, slower than your 56k modem despite being called a broadband.

Maxis would have been the fastest, and with the price which was slightly more expensive, worth every sen you're paying for. Download/Upload speed was on max of 1.8Mbps/50kbps. They don't encourage uploading, but with that download speed, I don't really care. The volume quota is lower and more expensive compared to others. But the problem was, Maxis has different dealers for different plans. I couldn't get the plan that I wanted, so I figured it was fate. Little did I realized that Maxis broadband has another famous problem which I'd overlooked. Pray it doesn't rain when you're connected, just like your Astro.

And then Digi entered into the fray when I could not search for the Maxis reseller. Yes, Digi's management is rather decent, with standardized outlets where you can ask for any plans for Digi. I registered mine in Leisure Mall, and the free modem was instantenous and the internet activation was promised on the same day. Upfront payment was only Rm100 for the student plan which included a free USB modem worth RM180.

Below are the photos of the modem:


After 1 week of trial, I must admit I'm rather satisfied. They'd promised speed of 700kbps/200kbps, and they could deliver up to max of 1Mbps download speed. So looks like I'll be stuck with Digi for some time for my online needs. :P

It is rather an irony that the first post in October after a few weeks of absence, would be written not at the peak of my health. Having not slept well since last night, I've struggled to seek the root of the problem. Could it be bowel obstruction? Could it be food poisoning? The constipation lasted for 2 days, with the persistent abdominal pain and bouts of fever threatening to consume my conscience. Again, I felt like a helpless one. What should I do? In the midst of shock --> denial --> anger --> bargaining --> acceptance. *sigh*

I wish I could be free of such pain. I wish I could be healthy. But alas, what can I do?

"Kiasu" is a Hokkien term for being afraid to lose. While they are mainly used by islanders (Penang, Singapore, etc), the culture has spread across the straits onto mainland, namely Peninsular Malaysia. People with "Kiasu" attitudes would do whatever it takes to win, or to be better than the rest.

In medical field, there are many ways to spot a kiasu medical student. Of course, if you really stare hard, you might not see it. Or perhaps you don't have such friends. Or maybe it's because you don't have a mirror in your room, otherwise you'll see it staring back at you. So, here's some clues on how to recognise medical students who have a "kiasu" attitude.

1. You wear your white coat everywhere. In the wet market, in the hawker stall, in the clubs (unless if it's a costume party and you're too poor/lazy to get a different one), and even in the toilet while doing some mega business.
   
   
2. You OWN the ward you were assigned to. You mark your territory (could be in primitive manner) with pure hostility and warn the rest from coming to your lair. In the meantime, you travel to other people's wards feigning ignorance. "Did I?"
   
   
3. Again, you claim rights to all the patients, and shoo-ed off people so you can do your examination, just to make a FOOL of yourself, because you had no idea what the patient had. One of the most fantastic move. Ever. Defying clinical approaches of all time.
   
   
4. You RUSH to the library, to the shelf where your colleague is staring at, so you'll outcompete him/her, when there are many other available shelves of the same section, when there's only the two of you. But then, good news, the fellow colleague was staring at a wrong section out of blurness, and you follow suit, exposing your "kiasu"ness. Oops...
   
   
5. You borrow the BIGGEST and LARGEST book in the library of the particular section, and yet without the intelligence to digest it, but with the diligence to show it off to others that you are reading it. But beware, you might be in the Orthopedics, but the book you're apparently "reading" is a misplaced Gynecology text.
   
   
6. You claimed that you excel with flying colors, with a distinction in every subject, because you know how great it feels to lie and be a kiasu. Until when you'd realised the results aren't that confidential even though you hid your results slip. The office stacked the certs openly, and truth behold, when all white became all black.
   
   
7. When a fellow medical student claimed having some medical illness (probably from Medical Student syndrome, or otherwise), you must step up and declare that you had at least one illness more than them, or a handful of it. Because it wasn't out of concern, but playing up to demand more attention.
   
   
8. You made a point to ask a question at the end of the lecture, not because you have a question, but because you MUST ask a question, even if it is irrelevant and may even relate to Astronomy, in an Anatomy class.

In the end, kiasu is NOT helping you to WIN. There's no victory in any field with such kiasuness. In the end, you spend more time trying to do all these "funny" acts that you spend less time on your actual goal. Would that really be beneficial?

Now that I've put up some, I'm sure there are more from you readers. Maybe you ought to share some of the "kiasu"ness you might have encounter? :P

The holidays had made me idle. As a matter of fact, I was hibernating in my room for a week at the very least, snuggling under the cozy blanket with my lappie. Idle life is good, and so is solitude, when you've been practically forced to meet people everyday. Different onesw every time, and to introduce yourself over and over again. I wonder if I was even doing it in my sleep! And meeting nutjobs over and over again while struggling like a pond fish in the desert. And no, I don't mean the patients in Psychiatry wards, they are of the most benign and vulnerable. I'm still with the idea that Psychiatric patients are people needing help in coping with the REAL WORLD because they are not crazy enough like we normal people are. It's just part of the illness where stigmatization should not be an issue. Sick people needs treatment, just like anyone who's down with flu.

At least they can't infect you, unlike flu, STD, or laziness and yawns. *wink* *wink*

It was last Monday when we had a gathering for Flora's farewell in TGIF, Wangsa Walk Mall. Quite a number of us were there, despite the absence of a number as well, due to work, exams, being out of KL, and some other stuff they have to tend to. And there were those old times cold jokes and trying to catch up on each other's life.

And we were back in front of Wai Sun's house, the four of us. Deja vu. It was few years back when we had really gathered up like this, had some personal conversation. Then, it was Wai Sun's farewell before he departed to US. Funny how it feels, because it's hard to imagine that we're now in our 23's when we were just in our 18's and 19's back then. A lot have changed, we had 2 graduated, and the other "2" would be following suit in 2 years time. And how we've missed the good old days in school when destinies weren't unveiled, and our paths converged for a while if not for eternity.

But time wait for no man, and before long, the next time we'll be meeting each other like this, hopefully, would be before our kids came along. :P See you soon! And MSN again it shall be, with the occasional greets from me. (U know I'm not really an avid MSN chat fella)

Well, just to update some stuff in the blog with my cynicism, since I guess I might have been too proficient in it. So here are some in random order, one for each day of the week.