Temptations & Ambitions

I'm sure at some point of time, most of us became avid readers. Such popularity was the book that we sat day and night to finish the book, or bringing it along everywhere we go. During meal time, in the toilet, on the train, walking back from the mall, or perhaps, while driving in a traffic jam.

But, sometimes, have we forgotten about mannerism? If there is such a rule, I would call it the book etiquette. While some may seem harmless, what we actually did was to deprive ourselves from the joy in life. Can you imagine yourself reading during meal time? I've seen many grownups father figures (not mine though) reading the newspaper while waiting for the wife to feed their children. If and only if the father would have put it down and talk and interact with is children, I'm sure he'll be able to see the joy of the family bond, and not by regretting having to miss it. Nowadays, even school children read their school books while eating with their family, whether inside or out of the house. Such is the kiasuness that most of them had, which does not even guarantee better results.

And sure, this had gave birth to a younger generation who wouldn't even look up as they gaze intensely at the book while talking to you. Is there any manners if you are at the receiving end?

Or in the toilet. Do you have any idea that many claimed reading while sitting in the toilet creates more constipation problem than you would have thought? But that's not my argument, but I just think that reading memory should be associated with better smell memory. Plus, I've seen many eating Nasi Lemak in the toilet in my secondary school. Maybe the extra "flavor" tasted good after all!!

Reading on a public transport may be a good idea if it's too long a journey. But this should be limited to light materials such as magazines. However, being one of those with motion sickness, I am not in favor of such habit. Unless you are sitting down, you should be aware of your surroundings while taking public transport, as pickpockets are always on the loose, regardless of where you are. The same goes for those who read while walking. You might be knocked down by any vehicles as you cross the road, or the foul victims of snatch thefts and robbery. These acts are done preferentially on those who are less alert, mind you. The robbers and thieves aren't exactly that stupid to not notice. So, don't blame anyone but yourself when you became such a victim. And reading while driving? That's even worse than drink and drive or on the phone while driving.

Reading should be done in proper places, where comfort lies, as it is of pure enjoyment. Reading in malls may seem somewhat attractive as claimed by Abby Wong in her article in The Star, but her somewhat weird fetish for "Guys who read in public" is a baseless recommendation. Instead of helping out with groceries, the guy may choose to read instead. Such typical male act would not be tolerated if found to be true, as it is just a method of escapism from duty.

What in the end, I am not discouraging people from reading. Read all you want, even porns if you fancy them, and I don't mind a little, but please be reminded of your book etiquette.

Found these few pictures, so I'd figured updating it would be nice.

The final week of ENT posting where there are more registrars (Masters student) in the wards due to their impending exam.

As a matter of fact, I went Jogoya last week with my parents and my dear. A combined father-mother day celebration, and everything's on me including the twin seats in Pavillion for Anghels and Demons later. But truth to be said, after so many thumbs up from blogs and friends, I'd a hard time swallowing it down. A big letdown, probably due to its quality.

Perhaps Jogoya was at its prime, years back, but definitely not now. Firstly, there are VIP counters with food reserved, which made it a no-no in customer service. Secondly, I would say Jogoya would have been a fine display of decent food for its price. It's definitelt not fine cuisine as mentioned by many others. Maybe it's due to the fact there many have not really tried what is FINE afterall. Among many choices, I would have said that only a few made to the passing list, the baked tomato seafood cheese, potato wedges (which KFC would have done a much better job), the coconut juices with their recycled shells, and the other beverage section. The satay was way off with normal Maggi Mee curry sauce, and any Station One cafe can outperform Jogoya in terms of steaks and meat. in short, none of it was outstanding, which I have to give credit Saisaki which would have done a better job with half the price. the list of dissatisfaction grew so much, and I figured even a meal in Smokehouse would have been a much better choice, a small but enjoyable quantity.

And none of the meat were fresh.


Fine display of plastic "shark fins" and fake abalones which taste normal that even "Lala" would taste better.

A bunch of "freshly" stir-fried golden needle mushrooms lumped with too much flavoring and tasted terrible.

A generally 3/10 for Jogoya. Or perhaps my expectations were really too high.

Nevertheless, Angels and Demons was a fine movie with spectacular scenery. It's better than Da Vinci Code movie in terms of storyflow despite its rushing ending. But none should expect more for a 2 hour movie. I'll recommend those who would prefer a better story, to read the book. Movies are after all, just a snipped version of the novel.

All in all, spent Rm400 on that day, so at least the movie was a redemption of the previous not-so-fortunate incident. Well, at least my parents were happy, and it has been really some time since they'd entered a cinema. So, I guess that's worth it. :P

It was my first day in Ophthalmology posting today. For the first 10 minutes into briefing, I was almost very sure that I hated this posting. Eyes, are just eyes, it seems. The coordinator did not make it welcoming for us to be there. It promised misery so true that we'll wish we would not be there. And the rules and regulations? Crappy.

But soon, I was proven to be wrong after all (Glad it was). In the clinics, the doctors were friendly and willing to teach to us. Never mind our supervisor wasn't there, but we learned what we came to learn. Too bad that I could not appreciate any, and blind as a bat we could be as. There were many findings, enough to fill in a third of my 20 requirements of fundoscopy findings, if and only if we knew how to appreciate them. But that's besides the point.

There was this elderly man who came for follow up. All I knew was there was something wrong wit his lens, I guess. Something ICOL or like that, perhaps spelled backwards or anything. He was asking for guidance on cleaning his wife's eyes. There, the doctor was correcting him for he caused pain to his wife, which lead to a much more heated argument, as he claimed. Despite being taught the proper way, he was reluctant to help his wife, for admiting a mistake took a lot from his ego.

And there the doctor had to do a counselling job. Marriage counselling it seems. Ways to "tackle" the issue so the husband would help his wife. Ways such as explaining to the wife that it was an "alternative" method to clean his wife's eyes which was taught by the doctor. And ways to fish out his love for his wife from the sea of egoism. It wasn't an easy persuasion, but it sure was cute looking at a 60+ years old man acting like a kid when it comes to ego.

And there was this case of a 12 year old child coming for a followup. Her left eye was injured. Child abuse. The dad and her step mum did the unthinkable. And there I was disgusted at the thought of the father who was heartless. Until I heard that it was a doing from a hammer by her father. That is just way beyond the soul of a living being. Poor daughter who had almost been blinded by the hammer of the father's doings. What was he thinking?

There were many more interesting cases which can be seen in the clinic. One thing for sure, I was glad I was there. In the clinic, we "see" the world through the eyes of the patients. And we, became the eyes of the society, to observe and watch the flow of time. It sure does look interesting, but I'll have to make sure I'm finished with the requirements of the posting. Otherwise, I'll be "able" to come here AGAIN. (Note: There's no ophthalmology posting in 5th year)

Life is all about making a difference. A difference with a sense of satisfaction when you knew that you were a part of it.

And that's what I think my life should be about.

Back in my secondary school, I believed that not all national schools are crappy. Despite others saying that a better future and results are ensured in prestigious schools such as VI (Very Idiot) or St John, etc, I enrolled in one. The school was on the down side with its poor performance, and I got a decent good results in SPM with 10A1s. It (and also better results from juniors) was enough to motivate the school to perform better, and to believe that it is not impossible after all. The teachers were happy since then, and students flocked to enroll in our secondary school. Of course, I was happy for 2 reasons: I got Rm200 from a decent results (while prestigious schools in KL would only award you a cert/trophy/plaque), and I got to make a difference. The sense of satisfaction that follow through was sweet back then. And that was the tiny little difference I was happy to make.

Well, that didn't end there as I continued the deed in college for STPM. I wasn't the first, but it gave hope to the teachers that their efforts were not in vain. Still, it was another sweet moment back then, where I had made a difference still, and not just filling in the numbers.

Until now, I still had the same feeling for where I lived. Not in academic sense now that it's not of a major relevance. I'd felt the duty to serve (but not blindly) the country I lived in, despite many of its major flaws. True, discrimination happens at times, but it happens everywhere in the world. Why would that stop us from being indifferent? Despite all the racism chants that were hurled almost everyday, deep down inside, we are all Malaysians. That would not change a single fact about it. Malaysia, afterall, is a multicultural country with a diversified population apart from its diverse flora and fauna.

If our country is weak and flawed, it is us who should work hard to improve it. Each country had its stages of development and go through the changes and growth. So, why are we running away to neigboring countries to enjoy their "development"? Can't we help out in our very own country? Can't each and every one of us make a difference here, instead of making the numbers in neighboring countries?

Help our own people. Rally for a change if we had to.

But I can't force everyone to accept my views.

Afterall, the grass is always greener on the other side...
Because we were too busy looking instead of tending the grass on our side.

Sometimes, the mind can be deceptive. Sometimes, it tells a tale far from the truth. And sometimes, it rather believe in outrageous lies rather than the cold hard truth. And let me share with you a recent encounter of mine.

I was on my way back from Laman Midah to hostel. With some "heavy" footwork which leaves more carbon footprint. As usual, the traffic was slow, and the eye wanders off somewhere over the horizon.

Then there was this car in front of me. It was shaking furiously from side to side while it was on the go. As it stopped at the junction, it was basically "bouncing" up and down, straining its suspension. And there I was, puzzled by the incident. What the hell was going on?

There was a guy at the back seat. He was facing me, the driver behind the car. I guess he was the one causing the lateral and vertical movement of the car. even through the window, I can see the man in specs nodding his head up and down, and then trying some manouever up and down, from slow and steady, building up a momentum which seems to be more furious as he continued. Not long after, another man sat up at the same level. He was in a messy state as well, the hair was rather messy from all the God-knows-what-they-were-doing stuff.

And there were so many questions running through my mind.

If you'd ask me, my first impression wasn't that clean, I gotta admit. What can 2 men be doing in the back seat bouncing up and down and in a messy state?

Well, it went on for quite a few minutes as I followed the car. I guess no one can be that athletic for such a long time non-stop. It looked more like an act of desperation. An act where it seems life and death seems of the main concern.

Till then was when it struck my mind. They came from Laman Midah. And the car seems to be going in the same direction as mine.

The hospital.

I guess after all, it was a resuscitation effort. CPR. Laman Midah apartments meant one thing: They are medical personnel at least, a place where UKMMC personnel and students hog a major part of the place. Maybe there was someone who needs resuscitation. I saw them heading towards A&E, but my curiosity did not seem to get the better of me. I've been traumatized by my initial thoughts, and I'd rather let it have a rest. And that was the case of a misunderstanding.

So next time, do not believe what you see. Things may not always be what they seem to be.
I may look fat, but to be honest, I am lean and muscular. :P

I've been living in the heart of KL for my whole 23 years all this while. I should have known the liar game inside out all this while. But sometimes, I proved myself human. I fell for the smallest tricks at times, when I begin to give the benefit of the doubt. To what extent? I thought I should let down my guard and to start to accept. But all I knew was sometimes, human are fallible creatures. The gullible side in every human would always coexist with their "innocence", as day and night would. So, why am I still so liable to believe such things at times?

Perhaps, it is the feel good factor, not to question, but to have faith in your friends. It is always tempting to believe each and every single word from pleasant looking strangers. It is always better to believe that a friend who pretended to be sick, rather than trying to question the motive of last minute ditching in the mind. And it is easy to believe a friend who claimed to be a genius and rich, to be rejected from an organization just because he/she was overqualified or due to reasons such as racism. It is easier to believe the claim of a housemate that he got 3.71 for his CGPA, when he had only 3.20, going great lengths to lie for the sake of nothing but a pinch of self-satisfaction.

And yet, these malingering happens all the time. Well, on one side, one would felt anger. But on the other side, they claimed that they had done no harm. However it may seem, if we look from a perspective, no one really does something for the sake of harming someone else. Each and every one of us, in our lifetime, did some harm to someone else, because of our selfishness and for self-perseverance. Hypocrites we are, but Hippocrates we aren't.

Politicians never tried to ruin the country on purpose, all they did was for their own benefits, in monetary gains, fame, and power. The same goes for the government as well as the opposition. The welfare of the citizens? They might be there, but it could be the 2nd, or 3rd, or 4th, or the last priority to the sake of non-existence. Pastors preach for they love God and wanted to be loved by God. And all religions preach the benefit for doing good for the sake of heaven. Wouldn't that be a form of materialistic gain? Can't we just help the others because we wanted to? Or arguably by some psychologists, we do good so that we would feel good, which could also be a motive in the first place. To what extent, I do not wish to explore, but all I can say that, it all lies in the gray area. Faith and lies would stay as in Yin and Yang, never to overpower each other.

The liar game, is after all, a test of faith. What is faith if there are no liars?
And what's a lie if there's no faith?

It's been almost a year since I last set foot in the 18-operating theatre center of UKMMC. It was during Surgery posting last year. Nothing much of a memorabilia in a place where there's everything and you gain nothing most of the time. But this time, I set my foot again, as a 4th year medical student. ENT posting.

And it was eight in the evening.

The on-call doctor had called us to look at an emergency tracheostomy(creating an external opening at the throat to ease breathing) under local anesthesia, a rare case when usually it's being done under general anesthesia. So there we were, our group standing in the OT, with soft music in the background. At least not some hard rock music preferred by some surgeons.

The old patient was anxious, but he soon calmed down after attempts to put him down on the "stage". His laryngeal cancer grwoth was too large that it almost obstruct the whole airway. Being too old, he can't stand GA for too long, so it was reserved for the later biopsy procedure.

The cold air in the OT invoke some nostalgia. Partially Surgery, partially O&G. Was it that long ago? I'd remember that I understand nothing of surgery, being a clown bystander most of the time in hope for a signature. At least this time, I get to understand how it's being done. Surprisingly, the "cutthroat" was not that grueling as it seems. At least not like those cricothyroidectomy done in the movies which looked dramatic and the impending threat of death loomed. Done proper, it finished in no time. The environment began to stir some feelings of the past.

Once I'd thought of being an ENT specialist. Well, perhaps that was one of the many reasons that tipped me in here. My own conditions which had not improved after a long time made me even more determined to find the answer myself instead of being conned by those private ENT docs. Now that I'm here, I'm beginning to seek for the anwers that I had been looking for. Allergic rhinitis, laryngopharyngeal reflux, chronic cough, nasal septal deviation, polyps, some minor obstructive sleep apnea, lack of focus most of the time, mood swings faster than PMS at times, they all fell into pieces. What there may be missing some pieces of the puzzles, at least I got the general picture.

The X-files are not that "X" anymore.

The interest in ENT would grow better if not for the rush of a short posting, and what now lies ahead is a long journey. Would I really want to be an ENT specialist? The thought lingers, but the pre-requisite of a being a Surgeon prior to that is not a welcoming thought. Isn't there an Internal Medicine masters instead? Or dermatologist? One thing for sure, the future is undetermined, and who knows, I might not even be in this field after a long practice? Again and again, only time shall tell.

A year ago, McD jacked up their menu prices. There were many complaints about it, coupled with the diminishing services and deteriorating food quality. Being a rather frequent customer especially when Wahid Cafe became dog food, I was one of the many who e-mailed to McD, and they had turned a deaf ear on it.

Nothing was been done, for Burger King, their once strongest competitor had now been nothing more of a shrimp. I remember the last time McD lowered their prices was not long when Burger King hit the market with style, threatening to displace McD out of the Malaysian food ecosystem. So, there was nothing much that can be done for this.

But now, everything's not the same anymore. The price increase turn down many potential customers, and the rumored McD supporting Israel had caused an uproar that everyone loves to see: Pushing the price further down. I wouldn't know if it's true of the support, but I am sure grateful for the action. A national boycott is what it takes to push the price down, a move really welcomed by McD's customers. Instead of having once every month due to the expensive tag, we had twice a week at a slightly cheaper bill. How's that going to sound?

Well, some may argue that it is affordable even at a skyrocketing price, but please look at the whole picture of affordability. Plus, you may not even be the one earning to pay for it. Not that it matters, you can even bring your own tupperware or your reusable McD wrappers and paper bags for takeaways if that pleases you to leave lesser carbon footprint, but McD ain't gonna bother about it.

Now that the McValue lunch promotion is running so smoothly, nothing can stop the customers from coming back, unless there's a new McD pandemic H1N1 flu. The success of it had made McD extending their promotions from only 4 basic meals at RM5.95 on weekdays to extended higher range menu at discounted prices available Large Add-on even on weekends. That means everyday!

Of course, nothing would stop us from having McD when we had the time. McD is the most convenient fastfood where there's 7 spots I've frequented, particularly when McD is "active" along MRR2. Even in ENT posting.

Now, how's that? McD meal is fully inspected. Safe and clean.. :P

How bout you?

I thought Med School is supposed to turn our hands into healing hands. I thought cadaver was the last dead thing we had to touch.

But I guess the movie Pathology might have been inspired by the Forensic Pathology posting. Cadaver was one thing, fresh bodies is another. Cadaver feels fake afterall. But fresh bodies? I had no idea. I wonder how many would just faint at the sight. I wonder if I would be one of them.

Surgeries are just incisions, but post-mortem felt more like decapitation and mince meat. And I wonder if it would be something like this below:

Holidays had been non-productive in a sense, but still managed to grab a whole lot of my time. So here's some updates of at least what I have done some purposeful stuff in my life:







11.Su Yan gobbling the sushi all by herself on Sushi King Bonanza.On Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

16.And the paper waste left by just 1 senior in a matter of a year or two. Imagine how much paper thrash we produce every year. Perhaps he might have thought it might be useful for us, and left it there, but we'd decided otherwise and sent it to the recycle pile. Save the environment.


17. 1st day in ENT, and the scary tools for you ears, nose and throat. Even the circus' sword eater might freak out at the sight of this.