Temptations & Ambitions

Many times we seek for the "perfect" match in our lives. Many times we've been swayed from the flaws we seen in our loved ones. We tend to forget why had we fell in love in the first place, and we pursue to change your loved ones to someone whom you did not love in the first place. And all in all, we lost in our self-conflict, and our relationship ended up worse off.

And there are times when seduction was too great and there are too much Nip Tuck or Desperate Housewives series running at the back of your mind wanting some real action.

And the spectacles of midlife crisis fueled on the crisis and made our loved ones looked like monsters in our very own eyes.

We are way too young to feel this, but be assure that most of us might be going through this one day, whether if it is today, tomorrow, one year down the road, 10 years or 30 years. Perhaps the video below would help you ponder in your path of soul-searching.
This is titled Funeral, a commercial video produced from Singapore's Ministry of Community Development, Youth and Sports. For once, I thought I had to salute them for such a heart touching film when the Singaporeans are crappy when it comes to love(As evidenced by their low marriage rate and the film "Love Matters", which garnered the lowest rating from all Jack Neo films). I thought I would just credit the Singaporeans for such a great commercial. For once, they had some true talent which is on par with Yasmin Ahmad.

And then again, a thought came to mind and I'd searched intensely as my fingers dance across the keyboards furiously to confirm my suspicion.

Damn.. got tricked.

It is yet ANOTHER great product from Yasmin Ahmad.

Another credit to a true Malaysian, although unrecognized by the Malaysian government just because of some gender issues.

*Sigh*

Now that is what I call a lack of recognition of talent, not those chinese scholars who went to Singapore to further their studies and call themselves the geniuses who got brain-drained.

He's smart, he's adorable and he can afford to be arrogant. He escapes with his witty remarks and he dares to defy the rules. And he tortures his patients before he eventually treats them. With such a character, most of the time, people can only love him or hate him.

I chose neither.

The point is, House is a medical student's fantasy most of the time. As they say, you love what you can't have. You dream of being a smart arse, and everyone else is wrong. You dream of defying the law, but you shiver at the thought of yourself doing it in reality. You think that you are observant, but all in all, you were dreaming instead of looking. And lastly, you think you can crack witty jokes, but all in all, all you can do is to freeze the can of drink on sight. Well, literally, with your jokes of course.

In short, you could only be just the opposite in reality, with perhaps a little bit of relative intelligence which awards you the title "House" from your friends.

Despite all the medical fantasies, the House MD series does not bank on its medical knowledge as its strength. Overdramatic scenes and underdiagnosis up till the last 5-10 minutes in each episode had left medical students curious and medical doctors furious over the professionalism shown by our favorite protagonist (or rather antagonist). So, does it really reflects the real life in medical field?

If you'd heard the responses, it would be somehow like this: (the largest group)

Doctors: (Major problem: Failure to humor)

• This show is a nonsense. It depicts a wrong picture of the medical practice and diagnosis along with a non-coherent steps in managing a patient which could lead to major deaths and exorbitant medical bill. If and only if they had follow the Clinical Practice guidelines, the show would last just 10 minutes.

Medical Students:(Failure to see the pitfalls and the life aspect)

• Guys: This show is cool!! They diagnosed this disease XXX and then that disease YYY as well as EFG. So many diseases, better get out my books and study about them to impress my fellow friends. Ah, how smart is House to get to the patient's conditions.
• Girls: Awh.... That doc is cute....

Other audience:

• Wow, so high tech and I don't even understand the terms, but I must watch cos it is very popular..
  
• Fill in the blanks...

No, if you got goaded into this field just because of the show, my advice is for you to drop it off. A.S.A.P. A doctor's fame, after all, is just for being a doctor. A doctor is not the master of the universe. They are just the experts (and sometimes not) of their own field. Give a basic Windows Media Player software to the old timer doctors, and at least 7 out of 10 need time to figure how to turn it on. The younger generation of doctors may be IT savvy, but technology waits for no man. New advancement would outbeat us one day, if we are to pursue further in the medical field. We can't do everything in this world.

And certainly, we don't do all the lab tests ourselves just like House. We had people specializing in lab tests, scans and many more.

Just to emphasize, House M.D. is a TV series which enjoyed a fanbase more than just the population in the medical field. Sometimes, it is just more of the hard perception of life that attracts the general audience: which most failed to and refuse to believe, that "Everybody Lies". The irony and ethics involved in life make the series in a more humane manner. Selfishness exists even in the kindest individual, and everything is done for an ulterior motive. Well, this could be a hyperbole, but it might suffice to remind us all who once thought that the world is one but happy family. If that is so, it is partially true, for people would not go all out with bad intents, it is just their selfishness that prevails in the efforts of self-preservation.

All in all, watch this series as a mere fiction and enjoy it as a whole. Take the good, the bad, and the mean.

* Note: This is just a piece of fiction scribbled to release the tension of staying too long under the same roof for the past 72 hours with desperation to update this blog.

And in remembrance of the fictional character Dr Lawrence Kutner, portrayed by Kal Penn, who had committed suicide perhaps due to the Shakespearish gloom in the series.

Yeah, i know Kal Penn joined the Obama admistration (from House to White House), but it's such an unjustified way to kill a character.

While the saying goes "Old is Gold", I'm afraid that many had taken it too literally. Here is an excerpt from The Star (at the bottom of the article):

"Sin Chew Daily also reported the case of a 60-year-old Malaysian woman, who claimed she was still a virgin, who was looking for a life partner in Singapore.

Huang Zhen Nee, a sales promoter, wants a partner aged between 58 and 65 and be at least 1.6m tall.

He must also take home a monthly income of between S$3,000 (RM7,200) and S$4,000 (RM9,600) and own a three-room apartment."

Could it be that this lady must be young at heart to make such a demand, or perhaps it was this search that made her to be "single". The materialism does not reflects on the mirror, but try asking for a guy to pay for an old pussy who's just a sales promoter at such an exorbitant price! Anyone who meet that criteria would rather look for a younger (and definitely prettier) companion.

All in all, you'll never know that it could be an April Fool prank that Sin Chew Daily or The Star had taken in too seriously.

Or maybe it's just "OLD IS BOLD"

*Sigh*

If there are signs that the year 2009 would be a year of raging hormones for the film industry, Fast and Furious would be the first top notch action film that cashs in with the classic formula: Cars, girls and glory. Never mind the classic formula. Never mind the Malay translation of "Pantas dan Garang". This show definitely lived up to its expectation of being a sequel of the famous "The Fast and The Furious" and "2 Fast 2 Furious". Well, "Tokyo Drift" was on the shabby side due to its lack of plot and too much car action though.

This timeline for this movie is somewhere between "2 Fast 2 Furious" and "Tokyo Drift". Perhaps the lack of connection between the 3rd film and the predecessors had made the producers to feel obliged to create a connecting bridge between these 2, and to allow the recruitment of the old casts from the first 2 films back. In short, this should not be named as Fast and Furious 4. It should ought to be Fast and Furious 2.5. That would be my opinion though.


The show starts with a big bang, taking note that the first 15 minutes ought to glue the audience to their seats. I wouldn't reveal much of the spoilers though, but the trailer of the movie entails bascially almost everything of the first 15 minutes. Being just like an expansion of the trailer, the movie took off to a more subtle storyline and a fair amount of furious speed though not as explosive as the initial 15 minutes. Nevertheless, the feel good effect of the show from the first 15 minutes were adequate to last till the end with an applause from the audience.

On a side note, some audience had mentioned that this latest sequel had less car action than "Tokyo Drift". To me, it is just nice, as the producers manage to blend in a decent plot with the show instead of the failing plot in Tokyo Drift of wrecking more property damage to increase the ratings of the show. This time round, the same director Justin Lin of Tokyo Drift had learnt his lesson well that a plot and the cast are equally as important in such a movie. Action films without a plot are as thrashy as cheap porn movies without a plot. They both satisfy the population with a brain the size of an amoeba. And oh yes, if you'd expect any sex scenes, I'm sure you'll be disappointed, or perhaps there was a cut scene somewhere which I'd failed to notice the plot hole. Sometimes I wonder if there is a need of a sex scene in almost every movie catered for the adult, as even the "7 pounds" ought to have a sex scene.

In the end, I'll say for sure this won't be the end of the sequels of Fast and Furious, as the ending had suggested. If you'd like action pumped shows, this is the one for you. Below is the trailer if you havent watch it.






Overall Rating: 4.5/5
Plot: 4/5
Cast 4.5/5
Action: 5/5
*Best action film so far for the year 2009

Nothing was stolen, no one was hurt. The morning my mother had woken up at around 8am, my grandmother was still sleeping in her room. My grandma should be having her morning wheelchair "stroll" by then. Mother was searching around for the maid and was puzzled by her disappearance. The house was a small one, so it took less than a minute to figure she was gone for good. I came down from my room and there it was, a note on the table:

To mom,

Saya dah balik ke Minah, tak nak jaga popoh lagi.

XXX


And there she goes, even leaving the house keys behind. I'll doubt she'll duplicate one since our "wooden" door is a custom-made aluminium(not like the flimsy aluminium can, I beg your pardon) one and hard to duplicate the keys.

The first thing that came to my mind was, did we mistreat the maid? Whenever I hear a maid on the run, that was the first doubt that came into mind. But heck no, otherwise she would be having her revenge and you'll see my family and I being in a massacre with not just stone mortars but basically any possible kitchen utensils that filled mother's kitchen. So, I must have been glad that I am alive, although I did lock my room before I go to sleep.

Before anything is hurled that I am a rich spoilt kid, I do handle my own chores when I need to, and I don't need 20 over maids to dress me or send me to toilet, and neither to feed me nor be my footrest. This maid was hired to take care of my grandma who had ambulatory problems which the new Neurologist in UKMMC diagnose as a Parkinson Plus syndrome of MSA due to her cerebellar atrophy, urinary incontinence and Parkinsonism. It is hard to tell with her stroke affecting her as well, which Prof Hamidon had initially diagnosed her as Parkinsonsim secondary to stroke. But that's not the point. the point is, the maid just need to take care of my grandma, while mother would still be at home to oversee my grandma's progress. No other house chores are needed.

I must say that this maid is really a smart one, for she had an ambition which would not befit as a maid. She'd run away after 8 months, because she would have repay all her debts to the maid agency, mother, and everyone else before she starts anew, possibly in the restaraunts in Chow Kit where her ability is highly sought after and she was offered more than RM1k a month plus the freedom to go anywhere she wants. She made sure she'd done everything in order so that we wouldn't be too hotheaded to hunt her down.

As sometimes I would think, a smart person would not be contented with such a job, so they'll make it a stepping stone.

Yes, a dumber one may have ambitions too, but they are stuck because of their own folly.

Nothing can be done now, guess we'll get a replacement from the maid agency while mother would have to take care of grandma and I'll need to help out a bit here and there.

For the runaway maid, good luck on your pursuit of happiness. Let's just hope no one get cheated again.

That was what everyone told me when they got involved in it, whether by choice or not.

Then came the breakup part, whether if it's 1 week, 1 month, or a year later. Everything just did not seem to connect anymore. Tears flowed, then there were those ala flash floods, and possibly the most disastrous outcome: the tsunami of a post-relationship. Just the thoughts of LDR send a shiver down the spine for most people. Deep down their hearts, they knew that it's going to be a hard time for LDR.

But don't get me wrong. I'm not discouraging anyone from LDR. Don't break up just because you have read this somewhat "enlightening" post, for seeing is believing. I might be wrong, but statistically, 9 out of 10 LDR failed. Don't approach me and say that your LDR works when you have not reached the end of the LDR challenges. Even getting married does not solve everything, as married men are equally as gullible (if not worse) to cheat on their significant other.

But let us dwell on the meaning of LDR before we jump into any conclusion, at least, from my point of understanding. It is not just bounded by distance, but includes time and experience as well. Picture this, a couple working in different shifts of a day are bound to have the same problem in an LDR, although physical contact and intimacy could still be uphold in such a challenge. Even couples from different fields of work pose a challenge, particularly when the career demands more attention than their significant others. Therefore, here is a list of pitfalls in an LDR in the sense of a far distance apart:

1. Distance
   
   
   
   

   The classical example of LDR is portrayed by the lack of physical contact, sexual intimacy and the memories of the significant others. As the old saying goes, "Out of sight, out of mind." Yes, sometimes "absence makes the heart grows fonder", but in the long run, it would still ended being compliant to the former statement when there is no contact between a couple. Communication is the essence of a relationship after all. With the advancement of technology, no doubt you can communicate with your significant other, but the lack of physical contact makes it rather superficial and virtual.
   
   Try to meet up if possible, but not too often as there are other things to do than just meet up and doing nothing.
   
   
2. Duration
   
   
   
   
   
   Be realistic. A one-month absence is definitely be easier to go through than a 10-years absence. Time is the cruelest tool of torment in an LDR. As time goes by, LDR can be a prison for both of you as you are tied down by staying in for your intimate phone calls or chats while the beautiful world outside is waiting for you to explore. And time seem to come to a halt while you were missing your significant other, making you dread the days that soon to come by.
   
   Just make sure you have a mental preparation of what to expect from an LDR. Make yourself busy if you have to, and run the world like your threadmill as you pause by to share your experience with your beloved ones. This is much more beneficial than staying in every night without anything to say.
   
   
   
   
3. Ground rules
   
   
   
   
   
   There are a number of advices given for couples to have a set of fixed ground rules beforehand, whether to call every day or so, to chat about stuff, or to do some online activities together. In general, this may be a good idea to make sure you and your significant other free up time for each other, but flexibility should be given priority. You do not expect your significant other to be jovial during the pre-exams tension if he is always the kind to get stressed up during this "season". Or sometimes, he/she may be busy handing some tasks at hand or getting too tired. Or there might be a night out for the guys/girls which your significant other would want to attend but being held back by the phone calls. Given long enough, this passion that both of you share may turn into a sense of responsibility, which can be quite a killer because it would be too late when you'd realised it. So give yourself and your significant others some space to breathe. You wouldn't want to suffocate them, would you?
   
   Given that relationship is an art and not a mathematical equation, the balance is hard to come by and differs from person to person, making it an even harder task altogether.
   
   
4. Insecurity
   
   
   
   
   
   "What if he/she cheats on me?" "Would he/she be loving me lesser as each day passes by?" These questions are on the infectious side, and sadly to say, your family doctor would not be able to cure it. When you are far apart from your significant other, your mind starts to play all sorts of game on you, making you doubting your significant other, and vice-versa. The sense of insecurity is further amplified when there are "competitors" around while you aren't. Just to quote an example, a friend of mine having an LDR with his gf found that most of his high school friends are trying to go after his gf. And it's a different bunch everyday trying to do all sorts of chore for her such as carrying her bag to classes!
   Let's just face the reality, if your significant other is the type to be infidel, your worries would not change the outcome. In fact, thank the "competitor" for weeding out for you!
   
   So, you should trust your significant other instead. Honesty and trust is always cherished in a relationship. (but do not confuse honesty with lack of flattery)
   
   
5. Temptations
   
   
   
   
   
   Ah, the pretty girl in the business course, the cute eligible doctor in the A&E ward, and the ones who are willing to shower you with gifts or bring you out to posh fancy restaurants. The temptations never run dry from the Pandora's box if you'd asked me. This is the part where coincides with the world's righteous selection: gray and not just black and white. You must remember to draw a clear line between you and the temptations surrounding you, in hope that you do not go overboard. Know your limits, and remember, karma does exist, and it affects you now and then, so beware!
   
   
6. Ambitions
   
   
   
   
   Sometimes, a relationship is clouded by the difference in ambitions. Your boyfriend may want a maid as a wife, but you disagree otherwise as you aim to conquer the world. You may be the one to be easily contented, but your girlfriend may want you to work harder and be a billionaire by 30. Or perhaps both of you have your dreams to chase, and you think that you have to choose between your dreams and your relationship. You might even think that your significant other lacks the quality you seek as you climb towards your ambitions. All these irony just meant that it would not last and rather than sticking to it, you're advised to end it early. If you wouldn't want it to be so, the best thing is to compromise and juggle your time for your career nad your relationship. It wouldn't be easy, as I'd mentioned, but at least you have to try to make it work.
   
   
7. Pressure
   
   
   
   
   
   Imagine the piling up pressure when people tells you that they envy your relationship. You became even more afraid that the bubble might burst. As you exert more on yourself to outdo the "odds" that you imposed on yourself, the self-fulfilling prophecy works its magic. Soon, you'll be overpossessive and drive your significant other crazy.
   
   Try to maintain a cool head and reason out your doubts. No harm sharing it with your significant other, but don't bring out the subjects too often. Even the repetition of "I Love You" might lose its appeal and passion if you'd used it too often, particularly if its the main content of your chats.
   

As mentioned, there are also other pitfalls, but here is where I stop for you readers to ponder. Do not just blame it for the lack of feelings for each other as the distance has increased by time, but rather channel your efforts to making your relationship works.

In the end, an LDR is just like walking a 50km path on foot when you can hitch a ride thorugh the journey. The journey is a horrendous torment itself, and those who live to tell the experience are heroes of their own tales, while those who stumbled lived to remember the nightmares of such a journey, or to withstood the challenge again with the lessons well learnt.